“The Advantages of Authenticity”: A Review of You Can’t Make This Sh!t Up: Stories of a Badass Life by Stephanie Geller

 

(Precocity Press, 2024). ISBN: 979-8-9892043-7-3

From Waffle House waitress to millionaire investment professional (achieved by the age of 40), Stephanie Geller is a modern success story. Throughout this series of anecdotes that travel back and forth through time, grouped thematically with section titles such as “Work Hard, Play Hard” and “Not Everyone Gets a Trophy,” Geller proves that Authenticity is key and, if you prefer high heels, your footwear never has to change as you go from rags to riches.

From its short, sharp, whimsically rendered sentences to its road-less-traveled humor and celebrations of victory in loss, You Can’t Make This Sh!t Up: Stories of a Badass Life is proof positive that how we choose to live and tell our story truly matters. There are divorces, deaths, and more than a few debacles in both her childhood and adulthood (with an adolescence that plays as pure cinematic 1980s teen dramedy). Through it all, Geller is never afraid to embark on the Hero’s Journey as many times as it takes to close the gap between Where She Is and Where She Knows She Belongs.   

The first stage of the Hero’s Journey, Separation, manifests literally—moving out of a chaotic home during high school—to more figuratively, such as when she distances herself from a needy, draining BFF. She ultimately goes the extra mile for him, however, related in a chapter whose opening line is, “I didn’t know you aren’t supposed to ship human remains via UPS.”

I chose the section title “Work Hard, Play Hard” because Geller truly lives up to this maxim. She is not shy about describing wild weekends with an array of casual lovers and all-night partying before big presentations and client meetings—all part and parcel of the “road warrior” corporate lifestyle. She is careful not to name names, but she gives us plenty of clues, whether it be a famously good-looking cast member from St. Elmo’s Fire or a senator’s son (first name only) whose father took a practiced look at Geller and assured his son “she could be discrete.”

Those who say “You can’t have it all” might be imposing too many of their own definitions and societal mandates on what constitutes “all.” Geller certainly seems to have figured out how to maximize her investments—both literally and figuratively.

The second stage of the Hero’s Journey, Initiation, is key to this memoir. Geller meets challenges with determination and sharp instincts as to how to close the gap. She “enters the cave most people fear to enter,” in comparative mythologist Joseph Campbell’s terms, and is wise enough to cultivate mentors and put in the effort to pass difficult tests (such as getting into the Dean Witter internship program). When a promising future as a gymnast, which might have included the Olympics, abruptly ends due to injury, Geller forges ahead without hesitation. Near the end of the book, she says, “I may have never gotten my chance to compete in the Olympics, but I was always competing.” What a marvelous testament to the fact that it is not What We Do but How We Do It.

Although she does not emphasize it in this memoir, according to her bio, Geller has visited more than thirty countries. I have a theory that the size of our opinions and prejudices is inversely proportional to the amount of experience we have outside of the sociopolitical and cultural circles into which we are born. Geller makes my case in spades. She has an openness to new experiences that underlies her Authenticity and success.

What strikes me most about You Can’t Make This Sh!t Up: Stories of a Badass Life is that it proves that the Hero’s Journey is not a once-and-done endeavor. It does so by highlighting a strong through-line (what we call the superobjective, spine, or character arc in storytelling) throughout Geller’s life and initiations that manifests most clearly in the section titles “Love with Your Whole Heart” and “Just Give a F*ck.” That second one is particularly important in an age where somehow NOT giving one makes you a hipster, postmodern rebel. What it makes you is vulnerable to the effects of your own inauthenticity.   

The “final” stage of the Hero’s Journey is the Return. This is where the writing of this memoir is essential to Geller’s story. Not only does she reap numerous hard-earned rewards after enduring the ordeals of her initiations—she shares what she has learned through the power of her indomitable spirit. Not only does she do consulting work, she mentors aspiring investment professionals.

I imagine she is far from done with her interactions with the Hero’s Journey and sharing her high-energy, endearing Authenticity with the world.

In closing, You Can't Make This Sh!t Up: Stories of a Badass Life more than lives up to its sassy title, cover image of a roll of bright white TP, and delightful interior doodles by Tim Kummerow. If you are looking for a little inspiration and a whole lot of hard-won wisdom, look no further than this memoir from the heart. Although the author and the marketing for this book like to say that it will not change your life, I respectively disagree. Well… okay… it might change some people’s lives, just like Brené Brown’s early work on Authenticity and Elizabeth Gilbert’s Big Magic changed mine so profoundly a decade ago.

If you are feeling stuck, or that the societal masks you wear as you navigate family, friends, the workplace, and the world are a little too tight and confining, I can guarantee that the multiple Hero’s Journeys taken by Stephanie Geller will inspire you to take your own.

And that truly can change your life.